Munkustrap:
Of the awful battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles
Together with some account of the participation of the Pugs and the Poms
And the intervention of the Great Rumpus Cat...!
The Pekes and the Pollicles, everyone knows
Are proud and implacable, passionate foes
It's always the same wherever one goes.
And the Pugs and the Poms, although most people say
They do not like fighting, yet once in a way
They now and again join into the fray
And they-
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Munkustrap:
Until you could hear them all over the park
Now on the occasion of which I shall speak
Almost nothing had happened for nearly a week
And that's a long time for a Pol or a Peke
The big police dog was away from his beat
I don't know the reason, but most people think
He slipped into the Wellington Arms for a drink
And no one at all was about on the street
When a Peke and a Pollicle happened to meet
They did not advance, or exactly retreat
But they glared at each other and scraped their hind feet
And started to-
Rumpleteazer:
Bark!
Mungojerrie:
Bark!
Rumpleteazer:
Bark!
Mungojerrie:
Bark! Bark!
Rumpleteazer:
Bark!
Mungojerrie:
Bark?
Rumpleteazer:
Bark
Munkustrap:
Until you could hear them all over the park
And they-
Rumpleteazer:
Bark!
Mungojerrie:
Bark!
Rumpleteazer:
Bark!
Mungojerrie:
Bark! Bark!
Rumpleteazer:
Bark!
Mungojerrie:
Bark!
Rumpleteazer:
Bark
Munkustrap:
Until you could hear them all over the park!
Now the Peke, although people may say what they please
Is no British dog, but a heathen Chinese!
And so all the Pekes, when they heard the uproar
Some came to the window, some came to the door
There were surely a dozen, more likely a score
And together they started to grumble and wheeze
In their huffery-snuffery heathen Chinese
But a terrible din is what Pollicles like
For your Pollicle dog is a dour Yorkshire tyke!
Toms:
There are dogs of every nation
The Irish, the Welsh, and the Dane
The Russian, the Dutch, and Dalmatian
And even from China and Spain
The Poodle, the Pom, and Alsatian
And the mastiff who walks on a chain
Munkustrap:
And to those that are frisky and frollical
Let my meaning be perfectly plain
Toms:
That my name is Little Tom Pollicle
And you'd better not do it again!
Munkustrap:
And his braw Scottish cousins are snappers and biters
And every dog jack of them notable fighters
And so they stepped out with their pipers in order
Playing "When the Blue Bonnets Came Over the Border"
Then the Pugs and the Poms held no longer aloof
But some from the balcony, some from the roof
Joined into the din with a-
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Queens:
Bark!
Toms:
Bark!
Munkustrap:
Until you could hear them all over the park!
All:
Huffery-snuffery
Huffery-snuffery
Huffery-snuffery
Huffery-snuff!
Munkustrap:
Until you could hear them all over the park!
NO!
When these bold heroes together assembled
The traffic all stopped, and the underground trembled
And some of the neighbors were so much afraid
That they started to ring up the Fire Brigade!
When suddenly, up from a small basement flat
Who would stalk out but
All:
The Great Rumpus Cat...?
Munkustrap:
His eyes were like fireballs fearfully blazing
He gave a great yawn, and his jaws were amazing
And when he looked out through the bars of the area
You never saw anything fiercer!
...Or hairier
And what with the glare of his eyes and his yawning
The Pekes and the Pollicles quickly took warning!
He looked to the sky, and he gave a great leap
And made every last one of them scatter like sheep
And when the police dog returned to his beat
There wasn't a single one left on the street
All:
All hail and all power to
The Great Rumpus Cat...!
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